“I wanted to thank you for sharing your experiences and wisdom in your books, ‘Hard Choices’ and ‘Light in the Shadows.’ I ordered two copies of ‘Hard Choices’ one to give to my mother’s doctor and one for my family to keep and share. It is an exceptionally informative book. My husband is reading it now and it will be a discussion point for our planning for our end of life wants and needs.”
“Both my brother and I used your book and particularly your poem about "letting go and letting be versus giving up" to comfort our mother when she was dying of colon cancer... Unbeknownst to both of us, your poem was the one that we recited to our mother on our last (separate) visits to her. Your poem gave us all comfort.” ~ Family caregiver, New York
Giving Up, Letting go, and Letting Be
by Hank Dunn
Giving up implies a struggle —
Letting go implies a partnership —
Letting be implies, in reality, there is nothing that separates.
Giving up says there is something to lose —
Letting go says there is something to gain —
Letting be says it doesn’t matter.
Giving up dreads the future —
Letting go looks forward to the future —
Letting be accepts the present as the only moment I ever have.
Giving up lives out of fear —
Letting go lives out of grace and trust —
Letting be just lives.
Giving up is defeat at the hands of suffering
Letting go is victory over suffering
Letting be knows suffering is often in my own mind in the first place.
Giving up is unwillingly yielding control to forces beyond myself—
Letting go is choosing to yield to forces beyond myself —
Letting be acknowledges that control and choices can be illusions.